kkyxhappyfeet's blog

2011-11-30T22:00:00.002+08:00

I hope we will be together again. I will always love you forever, no matter what. I want spend as much time as i can with you. I really want to. I don't know how long i have to wait, or how long more i can tolerate being far away from you. I just love you. Always.

2011-11-30T00:12:00.001+08:00

Just another day filled with despair, grief and silent tears.

2011-11-29T18:58:00.001+08:00

You're making me feel so terrible, don't you know?

2011-11-29T00:32:00.002+08:00

I longed to see you stepping into the hallway, donning a dazzling white dress, wearing beautiful makeup, your every step ringing in my ears. But no. I couldn't see a glimpse of you at all. Where were you when i wanted to see you so much? Don't you know i miss you? You don't even miss me at all do you. You'd rather forgo the money you paid than see me. Why? Why are you so heartless? Don't you have any love left for me at all? What's wrong with you?

2011-11-27T16:01:00.003+08:00

I love you still. I miss you. So badly. I won't ever forget you. Ever. If only you can still stay in my life. No matter how stressed i am or fucked up when i'm with you. Just know. I will always love you.

I love you.

2011-11-25T23:31:00.001+08:00

I miss you. Just so you know.

2011-03-24T17:44:00.001+08:00

I need to make her leave me. She won't be happy forever like this. She should find her true happiness. I'm only hindering her. I love her.

2011-02-21T01:10:00.003+08:00

It's just so hard for you to love me forever isn't it. Don't then. Please don't. Don't have to force yourself. Don't bother trying. I make you fail everytime. Just forget it. If only i had said no back then. You wouldn't have to go through this.

Missing you...

2011-01-01T18:12:00.003+08:00

I'm just missing you a lot... I feel really desperate now. Wish you could talk with me all day, even if we end up quarelling. I just need to know that you're still here with me, and that you still care for me. Even though i'm surfing the net and watching the tv at maximium volume, i'm still thinking of you. Missing you. Wanting you to talk to me. I have stuffed myself with chocolate to try and forget myself, but i still can't forget you. Not even with the sweetness of the chocolate. Because you're just too sweet for me to ever forget you. You're sweeter than anything, or anyone could ever be. Meanwhile I'm just waiting for you. To text me, call me or anything. Just want to exchange words with you. I love you...

I love you....

2010-12-31T02:00:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling really empty now. I feel it everytime you're not here. Life just seems so meaningless without you. Just wish i could spend all my time with you, stay up with you, talk with you. But i guess you can't do that everytime right... It's alright i guess. At least i still have you. I'm not afraid to cry every now and then. Because it shows that i still love you, care for you. It's good when i'm hurting because it shows how much i trust you and believe in you. I have to try and pretend i'm okay sometimes, because i just don't want to bother you. I would rather enjoy my talk with you, no matter how short it is. I want us to have a future together. One we would enjoy for years to come. I daydream about you sometimes. About how beautiful you are. How intelligent you are. How lovely you are. I just don't know how lucky i am. I really hope it's all fated. Because i'd find it hard to live without you. And i don't think i ever can. Wish you would stay with me, forever. I'm sorry for how much i've hurt you. I can never make up for it. I can only regret. Regret that i will never be able to change all that. Yet i still hope. Hope that you will forgive me, that i can live my life loving you. Everytime i wake up, i'll be texting you. Because i know. Without you. It's just impossible to live properly. I'll never be complete without you. You are my only hope. Our relationship is where i'll put all my faith into. Every last one of it. I can only put all my hope on you, on us, it's the only place where it will be safe, where it will never be shattered. I love you with my heart, with my soul, with myself. To put it simply, I love you.

2010-11-05T14:22:00.001+08:00

Why do i even care?

Finding myself within

2010-07-22T23:51:00.002+08:00

I just can't control myself. It's like I don't even know what is going on with me. I thought I knew myself, but now I am not so sure. I feel as if I was just living a lie, and being kept in the dark about myself. I don't really want to care so much. I just have to be okay and that's it. I want to be alright, and I will try to be myself, even if I have to do it alone. I want to believe in something. I will do it alone.
"For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness."

Can't sleep yet

2010-07-10T23:56:00.002+08:00

Went to english tuition just now, was damn boring without Mr Chia. Came home and did some homework. Rested all the way till now. Nothing much to do to be honest. I am too lazy to study anyway. Just guna hang around surfing the net until I get tired. Mmh.....

Early in the morning!

2010-06-29T05:06:00.002+08:00

Hey! I know it is too early to be using the computer, but I can't sleep. School is still going to be as boring as ever I guess. Oh well, nothing much I can do except go through it all with my friends. My thermometer is damn dirty, don't know if it still works, going to bring it to school later to check it out. I am just going to slack around until it is time to go to school. Sigh...

The holidays are getting shorter...

2010-06-24T16:10:00.002+08:00

Sigh, I need to rush my chinese and english assignments over the next few days. Very boring. It might be hell when school starts again. It's like I don't want to see any paper again in my life. I am definately not cut out for studying. Just trying to lose myself watching videos on youtube. Heck, life is forced upon you, what can you do? You don't feel like living with all the stress, problems and difficulties. But you can't die too for fear of your family and friends being depressed when you die. It might even leave an emotional scar on them. Missed the days where schoolwork was a piece of cake and I had time to try and shut myself away.

Lost

2010-06-11T21:34:00.002+08:00

Ruby died today... I was pretty sad. I just liked her, so cute. Pretty little hamster. She is currently burried at Pearl's Hill City Park. I guess I will miss her. Outing is cancelled. Sigh, I just don't know what to do now. I am just going to stop here.

Had a good time

2010-06-10T20:52:00.003+08:00

Was playing pool with bro in the afternoon. Was fun, with the balls making strange turns. "What the...?" Haha. Went to his house for a while and came back. I am quite worried about the outing, quite little people go. Still, I am guessing I will take a bet and see how many people come. I just hope everyone will enjoy themselves.

Fuck this

2010-06-06T15:09:00.002+08:00

Ruby is very sick. =( I really don't know what to do. Very sad seeing her like this. I hate it when you feel so frustrated, and you can't do anything about it. I just wish for her health, it hurts just looking at her and thinking how much she is suffering. It is bad enough being kept in a cage and just live your life eating, drinking, sleeping. It is worse to suffer from illness and live in pain. That is all. I didn't really feel like posting, see you.

No return

2010-06-05T22:57:00.003+08:00

"Trying to turn back, only to realise that I have lost myself again."
Haven't posted for some time, was enjoying my holidays playing games. Had an outing on 2 June, going to organise another one on 10 june I think. Don't ever feel like doing any work anymore. Just want to relax for the rest of my life. Not possible, I know, and I should just probably get out of this fantasy of mine. Well, I do not think i am going to give a darn anytime soon. I might as well relieve myself of burdens while I can. This is all for now, see you soon again.

Free

2010-05-20T00:57:00.002+08:00

Hey there everyone, i got sec 3 camp on friday and will be back on saturday. I will be going to Karimun island, Riau, Indonesia. Class outing will be on 2 june, for 3A people only.=) Well, nothing to post really. Just guna wait for the holidays. Got my class and level postitions.
Class position: 11 Level position: 12
Quite surprised, didn't know i could do so well. That is all for now i guess, see you!

Post-exams!

2010-05-13T23:25:00.002+08:00

Whew, got back some exam papers already. Oh well, don't feel like posting on them, just want to post on my overall results when i get them back. Slept during chemistry class today. Geog was mostly free period. School life, i missed it during the exams. Yawns, guna sleep now. Very tired. Don't want to collapse during PE tomorrow. Good night!

Wisen up already

2010-04-04T01:09:00.002+08:00

Whew, exams are all around the corner. Got pressure to start revising now, else im screwed for MYE. Some tests going on next week. Wonder how a math and ss remedial guna turn out. Was real sick on friday, prolly not enough sleep. That's why im going to sleep now =). Won't be on for sometime i guess, not with sec 3 syllabus piling in my mind. Just something to end off now, bye.
"A wise person forsees problems and prevents them instead of solving them when they arise."

Crazy!!!

2010-03-18T00:26:00.003+08:00

Just went crazy messaging with someone who also went crazy becuase of me.=) I still have a stockpile of homework to do. Syahirah just came back from Mauritius. Lemme just announce the prizes some of my classmates are receiving.XD
Position in standard:
Express
1st : Rachel Kuo Jing Ying 2/C
2nd : Rena Ng Hui Fang 2/B
3rd : Chua Jia Hui 2/C
4th : Emmeline Tjong 2/A
5th : Angela Htet Yi Linn 2/D

Distinguished Service Award:
Gymnastics - Vice-captain : Soon Syahirah

Heh, that's all. Guna end off with a short sentence.
"They say generals decide the course of wars, but it is actually the ability, attitude and action of every single soldier that really decides how the war is fought."

Sec 3 is hard!!!

2010-03-04T22:50:00.002+08:00

Whew, great thing is, march holidays are coming up. Looking back on my previous time in sec 3, i feel as though i have just wasted some time back there. Oh well, maybe i'll just try harder after the march holidays. Sec 3 is hard, but i'll keep trying.=) Mm, just guna end here with yet another quote. Cya.
"Failure to prepare is like preparing to fail."

Inconsiderate people

2010-02-20T16:07:00.002+08:00

Sometimes i wonder how inconsiderate people can be. Many acts of inconsiderateness have shown themselves in front of me again and again. I'm just guna list some down.
1) People walk in twos or threes in a narrow walkway and block the whole passage.
2) People push their way into the train without letting people out first.
3) People , especially immature ones, try to act gangster. To me, they look like retards trying to act like idiots.
There is so much more for me to write[=)] but i have no time for these type of people. Have a performance later, guna rest for now. That's all, cya.

Sec 3 first month

2010-01-31T19:37:00.002+08:00

Yea, January will be over by tmr. There goes 1 month of being in sec 3. 11 more months to go. At least this A class was quieter than the last two years. Feel like saying nth to be honest, too much to describe. Been feeling solemn. Anyway mum just put me into physics, chemistry and A math tuition. Hate tuitions... Take up my time coz i normally slack during tuitions. XD. My new class is alright, i feel honoured already to be with the best in my level. I just wanna know why some people in sec school want to have bf/gf alr, like got nth better to do liddat. Why must like here like there, so troublesome. Nth else to say, just wanna be prepared for wushu competition, dun want my group to get one of the last again...lolx.

Time will say.

2009-12-12T16:18:00.002+08:00

Traitorous ones among family ties,
Beloved ones being double-crossed,
Masked ones turned on their own people,
Truthful people cheated by their closest ones,
A family estranged,
On the verge of internal conflicts,
In the end time shall reveal,
each and every one of us.

What to do?

2009-11-03T23:31:00.002+08:00

Been some time since i've posted. Was caught up playing games everyday. And unless, i got smth better to do i dun think that i can stay away from my com. Besides, nth to do for the holidays. Oh well, got wushu tmr, can't stay up too late. Cya.

Social Etiquette

2009-10-28T19:57:00.004+08:00

Went to a workshop at tanjong pagar today. Fun with social etiquette, if i remember. The trainer was hilarious. Lmao, i was laughing all the way. Had buffet for lunch, i didn't eat though. Just didn't feel like it. Trainer said there was more than enough food. That's the point. People always take more than enough food because there is more than enough food. Went back to school and stayed back for wushu open house preparations. Rofl, i was saddistic at the com lab. XD. Went home at around 6pm. Nth better to do, i started playing my com again. -.-

Where's time?

2009-10-18T00:50:00.003+08:00

Holy shit, lost track of time-.- Playing the whole day everyday=) Nth better to do except for playing again. Mum just got back from Hong Kong. Guess she's broke. =) New shoes for me and some tibits. Hahax. I might wanna leave this blog alone for a while. Blogging is getting repetive. Anyways, a few more sayings before i go. Till then.
"Feeding greed only brings about more greed."
"Learning takes place anywhere, inspirations come from everywhere."
"Everytime you fall, the true way to get up is to rise like a pheonix from the ashes."

Some sayings...

2009-10-10T02:23:00.002+08:00

Well, short post now, cuz i'm guna slp. Just wanna update a lil. Guna post some sayings, i guess. Well, here goes nothing.

"Without a strong foundation you cannot go far, so start building one now."

"If my death can bring happiness to others, then so be it. Because just as death is inevitable, happiness is invaluable."

"Life doesn't decide who is right, only who is left."

Exams over!

2009-10-07T19:44:00.001+08:00

Hey! Finally exams are over! finally, got time for playing. zzz... This one is guna be a short post. Coz seriously i have nth to post. XD. Well, guess that's all. Cya.

"The world is a lie. Everyone is bits and pieces of it. One will lie and add to the lies in one's life time."

Rest!

2009-10-02T12:46:00.002+08:00

Finally, time for rest! Geog paper this morning, been tied down for the whole of this week. Dad promised to let me play com for a while. Stupid internet connection screwed up. Now i can only play one laptop at a time. Local PSI reading is increasing, i can see fog outside my home. Been studying intensively. Finally, a break. Really wanna sleep the whole day. ZZZ... Nothing to do except for study. Great... it's guna start all over again next week...

Want to sleep...

2009-09-27T10:00:00.002+08:00

Hell, been revising from morning till night. damn tired. Feel like lying down on my bed and sleeeep. Facekbook game made me frustrated. Anyway, today last day for relaxing. guna have to start revising intensively tmr. Mi Mi isn't feeling well, i really hope he will be okay. Mum asking me to start revising now, better go.

Exams soon

2009-09-19T19:26:00.004+08:00

EOY exams coming soon. ZZZ. Again. Go through all the boring days and especially boring days like oral and art and lit and f&n exams. Hell, might as well stay at home. Next week got 4 or 5 tests, much of it on tuesday and wednesday. 12 thumbnails by next tuesday! Tried not to play too much. Oh well, this is what i get when i start revising last minute. Have got no time for day dreaming now. Gotta push hard to try and pull up all my scores. Kicked the thought of changing schools, why not just stay here. My temper is slowly going down but it's still there. I really miss Yi Yi. Still, we have to turn with the earth right? Lol i missed out a lot on Mrs Dass homework. Lazy to do. Haha maybe i already blackmarked. Btw, good luck to everyone for EOY exams.

Yi Yi passed away...

2009-09-13T00:39:00.003+08:00

Damn, Yi Yi died this morning, or pherhaps early afternoon. I hate this. He passed away when mum and i were planning to visit him. Didn't even get to say anything to him. I really missed his company throughout the time i stayed at my cousin's house. PS3 wouldn't work and couldn't get a chance to play com. Felt sad throughout the whole of tuition. Well, will give this short write up to Yi Yi.
"With the saddening realization that Yi Yi had passed away, I knew that I had lost a loyal and caring friend. I tried not to believe he was gone, as I was sure that his spirit would stay on. He will still accompany me whenever I was alone. He will still come into the room to see if i was alright. His name will live on as his spirit will never die."

Yi Yi

2009-09-10T21:47:00.005+08:00

Okay I visited Yi Yi with my uncles yesterday. It was late, only one nurse on night shift. When i saw Yi Yi, his condition was pitiful. I really felt like crying, but i held back my tears. It just wasn't appropriate for me to shed any tears at all. Yi Yi was under a lot of stress as his body wasn't used to the treatment for his illness. Chemo, they call it. Whatever it is, Yi Yi was very tired after the treatment. That night when i slept at my cousin's house i really missed Yi Yi. I couldn't hear his footsteps, I couldn't hear him bark, I couldn't see him walking around, I couldn't feel his fur. If only i could do something to help him... Like I've said, his loyalty is undoubtful. Really hope that Yi Yi will be able to get well and go home soon.

I suck

2009-09-09T20:41:00.003+08:00

Kay, realized i suck at tracking people down and i'm not knowledgable in terms of happenings in school. Already finished most of my homework. Poor Yi Yi, his condition is worsening, i'm really concerned about him. He has been a loyal friend of mine for a long time. If i was in the room alone, he would follow and have a look at me. Even when he was ill, he did the same. To me, he was my closest friend whenever i visited him. I hope with my heart that his illness will be cured. Talking about other things, I only have feelings to say. I just feel that somehow other people are selfish, and i am more generous than them. I just feel that way, and i don't know why. Still, i don't trust this feeling. Didn't know i could be associated with wolves. Still, it all depends on personal views. Yes many things in my life depends on personal views. Nth else to say, so that's all for now.

Huh?

2009-09-09T10:41:00.003+08:00

well, huh. Nothing to post, didn't even know why i tried posting so early in the morning. Anyway, was watching youtube for like 1 hour, lols. Damn, UT3 kept lagging like shit. I keep getting disconnected in the middle of a battle, sucks. Well, guna eat smth now. Till then.

Pasir Laba camp part 2

2009-09-07T22:30:00.003+08:00

Hey, finally found time to look around in the afternoon. Had to work as normal in the morning. After that went to look around the camp with my dad. Saw different military vehicles, including transport and attack helicopters, tanks, artillery and support vehicles. Also saw different weapons such as GPMG( General Purpose Machine Gun ), SAR( a locally modified rifle ) and SAW ( imported machine gun ). I got to wear a helmet, carry a rifle and a backpack. Backpack was 10kg. Had to march fast. Whew, my legs felt weak after the walk, haha. After that, worked all the way till evening again and pack up!. Feeling sleepy now. Anyway, cya.

Pasir Laba camp

2009-09-06T22:26:00.002+08:00

Wen to Pasir Laba camp today to help my aunt out. From 9am to 7pm! Felt really sleepy man. Jeanie also felt sleepy. ZZZ... One more day to go, hope i can last throughout the day. bored being in a small building with no chance to have a good look at the military vehicles and personnel outside. Damn... Maybe i'll get a better chance tmr.

Critisizing teachers

2009-09-05T19:43:00.003+08:00

I feel that i really must critisize the teachers. The teachers are actually so open to students sharing answers for the tests. Take 2A for example. 2A students will normally get wind of tests' answers through 2B students. And the teachers don't even care about this. They are lazy to create new tests for different classes so as to ensure fairness. To be honest, i believe some teachers deliberately allow this to happen. They know if their class get higher marks in tests, then their class will score better in terms of results and they will be praised with a chance of getting higher recognition. If their class students can get a pass from getting answers from other classes, they will allow it. Coz if their class has many failures, then the teachers themselves will get sacked coz of the number of failures. Thus, I feel this is a point of teachers being corrupted. Biasness is another. I have seen examples of such taking place. I have lost much faith and hope in this school. All i want to do is get good results and i can leave this school. Also, I have no plans of going back again.

Blunder

2009-09-02T22:08:00.002+08:00

Kay, my mistake. I didn't post about ACES day nor teachers' day nor my gathering with p6 classmates. Hah, lazy to post i guess. Btw, i will be helping my aunt on her photography job, so i won't be free from 5 September to 7 September. Sigh, wonder what's the place and event i will be seeing. Damn, hope there won't be any homework for September holidays, coz i wanna play com. Still, it's good to have animals for company. Mimi and Ruby are doing fine. Just wonder how Yi Yi, Si Si and Fluffy are doing, might want to visit them during Septmeber holidays.

Upcoming things.

2009-08-30T19:53:00.004+08:00

Sigh, aces day dance and pre-teachers' day celebration tmr. Our class dance not even complete with music yet. Instructor teach us also got pissed off. Sigh, if only eunice was here to set things straight. I wonder how rare students like eunice come by. Just wish luck for the dance tmr. Will be going out with classmates from primary school next tuesday. Sec 2 alr still got class gathering, our bond are quite strong eh? lol. Will wish teachers on the day itself. Tmr half day at school, got more time relax at home. Still, i need time to find a personality that suits me. I'm tired of changing my character everywhere i go.

Hated

2009-08-29T18:19:00.003+08:00

These two years of maturity has taken its toll on me. I have been under constant pressure and stress. I was overwhelmed by the cruelty of this world. Whatever you get, there's a price to pay. Whatever you do, there's risks involved. I spent time thinking about things in this world. I spent time thinking about the people around me. I've grown tired of this place, I want to move on. Yet nothing changes, nothing is happening. I then realized that the price for change was that i have to change too. But how? Who will be involved? What will happen? Where do i have to change? When will things happen? I'll never know. Thus, I spend my time quietly, deep in and surrounded by my own thoughts. I could never brush away the feeling of superiority that i am full of everytime. I regretted my imperfect and selfless life. I immersed myself in entertainments in hope that i will become the immature boy i was once before. I don't want to feel that i have to be responsible for everything i do. I want to be responsible of my own accord, not forced to. I have watched and felt myself losing my sense of self-control over all these years. I have succumbed to my own mind. I have let my emotions take control of me. I have failed myself.

Feeling better

2009-08-25T20:54:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling better today, strangely. Pherhaps i've regained my consciousness and motivation to study. Especially in terms of maths. Topped the class PPR today. Finally, something i can be proud of. 95 too! (A1) Maybe miracles really do happen. Well, best of luck to me for the rest of the year.

Troubled

2009-08-23T10:01:00.003+08:00

Why does it seems like most of other people's life is way better than mine? Some have money, some have many friends, some have looks.I don't fall into any of those catgories. Everyday I see people better off than me. I struggle to suppress my stress everyday,I struggle to forget my mistakes everyday, I struggle to find myself everyday, I struggle to keep myself on the right path everday. If only life could be easier...

Load of tests

2009-08-19T20:55:00.003+08:00

3 test tmr. rofl. dunno how im going to study. Somemore still must prepare for debate. Mrs dass nvr do finish one thing then skip to another. zzz... wondered when i will be able to change school if possbile. Too late though, but who cares. Nth in my life to live for yet, just using pleasure and my family as a temporary method to keep myself going. As usual, thought about my classmates and after 10 secs dropped the idea. Pissed me off.

My first life

2009-08-18T17:30:00.003+08:00

Darkness, nothing took it's own form, just darkness. There seemed like eternal darkness, no track of time, there wasn't even a "I" yet. Then, light shone. I was officially introduced into this material world, full of happiness, sadness, love, hate, joy, anger, pleasure, suffering, truth, lies, life, death, sickness, cure, justice, evil, danger, safety, thinking and freedom. This is my first life. My first life in the entire world, universe. I was created different, i had to live my life with regrets. I used to think of the future, now i regret my past. I used to be cheerful, now my life is depressing. No one to understand me, no one to confide in, no one to help change me into a better person. Who am i to complain, but who am i to deserve these sufferings. I am human, i am just like the average person, but i am unique. I deserve to choose my own environment, not be stuck in such a incorrigible situation. Damn it, it should never have been that way.

Feeling low

2009-08-01T22:34:00.002+08:00

This week really sucked. Got way pissed off then usual. Coulnd't find time to blog. don't feel like talking about this week. Anyway, going to work tmr again. Wonder how it will turn out. Good luck to me.

ZZZ.

2009-07-26T01:59:00.001+08:00

ZZZ. boring. got nothing better to do other than play. shit sia school. dreaded time for me. later today need go back home alr. zzzz.

Getting personal

2009-07-20T21:15:00.002+08:00

Looks like being a loner is pretty good. I had ample freedom and no one pissed me off today. Good, at least im in a seat far from rowdiness. Pherhaps its my mind that is really far from that, but who cares. Well, nothing interesting. Mrs Dass tried to do some activity with us, but still, ended up messed up as usual. Nothing else to talk about. Typical school day anyway.

MC

2009-07-16T10:41:00.002+08:00

Rofl, got owned by mc. Can't go to school for two days. Down with dry throat, fever, cough and flu. Have to take 4 diff types of medicine per day. zzz... Boring, but at least im with my laptop.

Swine Flu!

2009-07-14T21:38:00.002+08:00

Lol i think 2A has confirmed case of swine flu liao. Today got so many people sick. Some got cough, some got sore throat, some got flu, some got stomache, temperature all high. zzz... Still no time see doctor, damn it. I just hope not swine flu, maybe it's coz the ozone layer in the central area depleted, then the UV-rays all dried us up. ZZZ, I HATE SWINE FLU, BLAME MEXICAN PIGS! XD. Singapore governemt can't even control liao, got so much money also no use. Boring sia.

This is life.

2009-07-13T20:31:00.004+08:00

We can't get what we like ,
We don't like what we get ,
We can't do what we like ,
We don't like what we do ,
Still we forgive ,
Still we love ,
Still we live ,
This is life.
---
Days are getting random, my mood follows suit.
Years after it will get different, but now i live with it.
This world gets complicated, when problems find its' way to you.
Solving it will be hard, and yet i still try hard.
Because if you don't give up, life will not give you up.

What to talk about?

2009-06-27T22:48:00.002+08:00

What can i talk about? About me feeling very stressed doing the chinese and english assignments? About me feeling hard on myself for wasting my time and harming my own health playing computer games? About me neglecting my own hamsters and staying at my cousin house for my own pleasure? About this dreaded feeling that keeps bugging me whenever i think of school? About me not wanting to see all my friends again for some reason? About not knowing what the hell is going on in my life? About feeling how useless and wasted my life is? About me making my parents sad that i am a hardcore game? Guessed i pretty much summarised everything. I had a new latop, and i used it for games. I promised to do my homework, and i dragged it to the last minute. I promised to sleep early, and i waited to sleep early in the morning. I pushed myself to do everything right, and i failed in everything. I struggled to understand everything, and i made myself fail. My imperfect life. My imperfect world. My imperfect self. All of a sudden i wish i had a friend to confide in. A friend who would completely understand me. What a world. What a life.

Smart Stress

2009-06-11T12:01:00.002+08:00

Discovered that smart and mature people actually feel more stress. One glance at them and normal people would think they have lesser stress since they know so much and don't have to study. I don't think so. Intelligent people tend to have higher expectations and push themselves to be perfect. Stress kicks in when they push themselves hard and more stress adds in from their parents who also want them to be the best. They feel that stress is a neccessity in life and make efforts to work hard. They understand more things and they usually take in more of things than others. That's a problem though, what others say about them will often be taken into deep consideration and they end up getting frustrated or sad over it, even if it was meant to be sarcastic or not to be taken seriously. They tend to be more afraid of things as they are worried about coincidences of things whereby something will get to them somehow and harm them. Not a problem for me though, coz im only using 15% of my brain. XD.

Nothing to say

2009-06-06T21:23:00.004+08:00

Nothing to post, holidays anyway, also no one look. Realised i linked the wrong Mavis. XD. Patched up now. ZZZZ..................

My colour is white?XD

2009-06-04T13:10:00.002+08:00

Take the Magic: The Gathering 'What Color Are You?' Quiz.

Sleep

2009-06-02T19:08:00.002+08:00

I think i figured out how people sleep! XD. First, the mind reaches a suitable state for sleeping for an amount of time. Following that, the mind falls into a dizzy state. Electical signals travelling between the nerves begin to slow down and you will feel tired. Your thinking will also be affected. Meanwhile, your brain will send signals to your heart and your heartbeat will be slower than usual. Finally, you "shut"yourself off from the rest of the world and zzzz.....

Attending function

2009-05-30T23:46:00.003+08:00

Attended a farewell dinner to mayor zainel(who is that?) after tuition. Was there to help out my aunt along with my cousins. Wasn't the slightest bit interested in it. Ate some food too. lol. Then i went to bro house, damn tired sia...
Coming together is beginning
Keeping together is progress
Working together is sucess

Camp

2009-05-29T22:54:00.003+08:00

Going to start on things about camp from day 1. Read on.
Day 1:
Was excited at first when i went to school. However, after meeting the instructors my mood totally shot down. Knew the camp was going to be bad. Had to work on a flag, think it looked okay though. Had a break, and came back to class to pack up and head for the bus. Reached the camp and did some things. My general station was the zig zag. All about teamwork i guess. Nth interesting at all. Had a good night though, slept quite fast.
Day 2:
Challenge Day, as the booklet said. Improvised rafting sucked big time. Hardly any teamwork at all. Nth interesting except for the high elements. I played on the zip line. It's like damn fun man. The starting is so thrilling. Then went to the rock climbing wall in the dining hall. Watched the others do. Had campfire, was pretty tired out after it. Slept early i think.
Day 3:
Woke up early, was tired and lay down again. After that had breakfast and area cleaning. Stupid area cleaning, i had to clean the toilet. Then my shoes and socks all got damn wet. zzz... At least went home on a bigger bus than day 1. Was worn out i think.

Sucks...

2009-05-26T22:37:00.005+08:00

This day sux. Damn thing. Man, had to wait damn long for meet-the-parent session, coz my parents came way early. Went to library with daryl and read. Then he reminded me that it was my turn, then we run down first to meet his mum coz my parents still on their way back from Dawson. Mrs Dass didn't say much about me, whole thing was over in like 5 or 10 minutes, lol. My class position : 13/37 (improved, yea) Level position : 46/160 (good enough for me) Term 1 pulled me down, i understand why my scores so low now. So i need to work hard now! YEA! haha, wait long long loh. Everything depends on my mood. XD. My chinese improved a whole lot. Credit doesn't go to me alone. Just hope the Sec 2 camp will be fun and relaxing enough for me.

Wushu

2009-05-25T19:10:00.002+08:00

Dam tiring today, school was as stupid as usual. Nothing interesting. After school went koufu to eat. Damn expensive. Think got a hole in my pocket liao after leaving Dawson. Wushu damn hard training lar, especially when my leg muscle pain and weak. Drank two cans of H Two still thirsty. lol. Go home that time lay on my towel. zzz... Did finish my chinese online test. Got 18/25. Everything like nvr learn before sia, stupid. Wth, if everyday is like this im going to die soon.

ow...

2009-05-23T08:49:00.002+08:00

Leg muscle still cramped up. Wushu training on wednesday so hard, somemore so long nvr train alr. zzz.... Went to bro house yesterday, played assasin's creed on ps3. At night bro came home with a UFC ps3 game.Nvr play then go home alr. lol.

Another stupid day.

2009-05-20T19:44:00.003+08:00

Another stupid day. Teachers shouting at the class but not caring about those who really want to learn. Then suddenly brandon tell me got wushu today. Wah damn sian. Wushu coach make us train so hard, i come home muscle damn weak. zzz... very tired.

Stupid day.

2009-05-19T20:38:00.003+08:00

Stupid day today. Anyway, first, my marks. Chinese letter writing - 13/20 (okay...) Chinese Listening Compre - 18/30 (What the...) Chinese Paper 2 - 83/100 (Yea man!) Chinese overall -70.5/100 (quite good) History test - 61/100 (pass can alr) Literature - 25/50 (My reasoning failed...) Art - 68/100 (don't care) Okay day overall. Coz i scored well for Chinese.Today the boys spoilt something in class again. Kicked the ceiling and the panel came out. Then they stick the broom in try fix it. Kana saw by teacher. Then at that time Xuan lin, Jia min, Daryl and i see if music teacher in music room. Came running in and whoa, teacher. Then ball got confiscated after a series of events, which includes Mr Kong not getting to the bottom of the matter and asking all the boys to stand. It's not that i can't stand, but its the way he treats students. Nvr investigate anyhow punish. Stupid sia. Then got nth better to do, go buy ice cream with Daryl and Kah Weng and went home. Reach home that time then go out on an errand with my parents to Chinatown. Then eat at hawker centre and went my house block there wait for my dad to cut hair. Then go home and found my laptop working. Yesterday the charger cannot charge. Damn dumb.

Test Results back.

2009-05-18T16:27:00.002+08:00

Just got some of my test results back. D&T test - 35.5/60 (pass!) Eng Paper 2 - 33/50 (not happy) Maths test - 75.8/100 (Yes!) Science test - 81/100 (Oh yea!) Chinese Compo - 28/50 (damn) Overall im just happy that i passed everything so far. Hope my damn literature won't pull me down.

My first salary!

2009-05-18T16:19:00.002+08:00

Sorry, forgot to post what happened yesterday, shall do so now. Yesterday was my first day working! lol. Had to get up at 6.30a.m. with my bro but i woke up at 4a.m. coz sisi keep scratching the door. Then watch korean drama in ah ma's room till bro woke up. Then we got ready and went down to layna auntie car. She also picked up jeanie. Went to Clementi West Street 2 Blk 731. Total Defence celebration. Took some photos and hand tired go put down camera. Then slack around. lol. We went home in layna auntie car and she gave us each $50 pay for helping her. Wee.lol.Jeanie went home. I went bro house. Then play the com till siao. Didn't feel like going home at night, so don fetched me home. Thought the day would have been more fun if ada tagged along at work.

Slackx

2009-05-16T23:59:00.001+08:00

Slacked a lot today. During tuition also didn't do much work. After tuition went to bro house. Play some games, then i realise i didn't have a lot of games left to play. Everything become uninteresting.lol. Finding something good now. zzz...

MYE over!

2009-05-15T11:03:00.000+08:00

Finally, MYE is over! LC was hard, but i don't care, coz i get to play and play and play again!lolx. Zzz... Going to play now. Till next time.

Relaxed.

2009-05-13T15:48:00.004+08:00

Whew, damn relaxing today, can play finally. Warcraft-ed when i reached home. Anyway D&T and CL listening compre dun need study. Man, hope school will be over soon. I want to go my bro house.

Damn art

2009-05-12T17:17:00.003+08:00

Art is one of the worst subject i had ever taken. It takes up a lot of time and effort and it is super boring. Zzz... Draw finish felt like sleeping. At least yesterday was the last day i needed to study, great. Still can't get on terms with school life. Just hope i can make something out of it.Brandon and Thomas they all might go out on Thursday, I don't feel like going at all. Just gotta try my best for the next few papers, then two more weeks of normal school and it will be over! Yea. Just dun wanna play too much, save some time for other stuffs. Most likely will go bro's house. Forgot a lot of things i wanted to write about, all i know is that my overall exams marks will suck. zzz... Got 53 for lit, same as daryl. Dunno what happen to my clay marble presentation. At least pass. I don't think much of excelling, passing is enough, but i just need to meet my parents' expectations. This is all i think, didn't charge my laptop. Gonna off it now. Till Friday or Saturday.

Damn...

2009-05-07T22:45:00.004+08:00

Damn it... I studied algebra yesterday for god knows how many hours and i realised i don't know proportion. I know basic algebra very well. But my proportion like shit. Then today just flunked my maths test. Threw away 20 marks, somemore plus careless mistake surely 20 marks also. 80/120=60/100 pass but it's considered almost fail to me. I just insulted my own intelligence. damn the paper, only got like 3 algebra questions and i studied like an idiot for algebra. DAMN. There goes my A1.haiz. just studied science anyway, realised it was quite easy and just hope i remember everything till tmr. GL guys.Give you all my full support yeah?!

MYE

2009-05-06T12:37:00.003+08:00

whew, just took eng paper 2 and chinese paper 1 exam today. had time at the end, slacked around. Then got home early. Managed to get permission to blog. But i found out i had nth to blog. XD. Okay, that's it for now, going to have my early lunch now. Good luck to everyone for MYE!

Another tired day.

2009-05-05T19:05:00.002+08:00

Another tired day today, stayed back to watch bridge to terabithia. Quite nice the movie. Then reach home that time bath alr go sleep. Very tired sia. Then mum woke me up to revise for tmr exams. zz.. I want to sleep... Oh yeah, and i fell two times today, damn rare.XD.

Tired

2009-04-30T22:40:00.005+08:00

Exhuasted tday, keep dozing off during eng paper 1, think i write too short. Didn't know what to talk about school uniforms, lol. Had maths tuition 4 hours ago, bought mentos to eat and kill time, having something to chew on. Then watch some shows then go do assignment. Got 7 for statistics and 10 for direct and inverse proportions without cheating. Finally i felt good. Mum and Dad yelled at me for no shit i've done. Just cause they not happy they blame me. Like i happy like that is it, especially with this screwed up class. Now i know why eunice leave, she mature so much faster than me lol.

Shopped.

2009-04-29T19:55:00.003+08:00

Had quite a fun day today, slept during Mrs Dass class again, lol. Thanks once again. haha. After school bought an ice cream and called my cousin to come out and meet me to wait for layna auntie to come fetch us to go shopping with cousins and ada. Jeanie wanted to go dawson place. Go there and slacked. Damn boring my handphone no more batt.=s. Then layna auntie came fetch us at the dawson bus stop and went to katong to eat first. Wah the food there cheap, 1 chargrill chicken can buy two free side dish, and only cost 6.90. Next time sure come here eat. lol. Also talked about problems the tiong sim cousins faced.haha. Then go Tampines shopping mall and looked around. Layna auntie gave each of us $50 and i was like wow. Then all cousins and ada went shopping. I nvr spend any money. Wanted to save for mum. Then go home. I was the first to sleep in Layna auntie car. keep banging my head against the car, lol. Felt stupid. Then ada went home and jeanie and bro slept. Jennifer still awake, play phone. Layna auntie also feel like sleeping. Then reach home and bathed and ate. Going to study now. Till next time!

Yawns!

2009-04-28T21:50:00.003+08:00

Boring day today. lol. Felt like sleeping, for half of Mrs Dass eng period which substituted Mr Kong CME period, i was sleeping. XD. Then i think she knows, but nvr wake me up. Thanks Mrs Dass! Then today got damn bad flu. Wth, must be becoz of the pizza i ate yesterday. Lols. Just hope i get well before exams start. Otherwise i keep making noise during exams then my classmates can't concentrate. Went to science center at 2.30pm for weather bot project. Then calandra and emmeline keep telling Mr Ando Chia they dun wan go. In the end still must go. haha. Then at the science center there Daryl damn playful sia, keep doing funny things and disturb me. After science center go buy smth from the mac outside. Then homed.

Boring.

2009-04-26T12:53:00.002+08:00

Boring day today... Mum making me go do asessments, then i bo liao keep blogging. lols. Early morning woke up and eat, and then just now eat again. XD Mimi and Ruby waking up. Worries and Comforts go out to Jeanie sis and Xuan Lin. Stand up for yourselves yea?

Tired Days...

2009-04-22T16:51:00.004+08:00

Very tired these few days, since the start of monday. Didn't blog about the syf chinese dance competition yesterday, just found out we got a silver, i guessed it. Today have to stay back coz of mrs dass, do what pw and clay marble. zzz. I keep on stammering. lol. Going to do some homework now.

Yesterday...

2009-04-16T22:08:00.004+08:00

I didn't have enough time to post yesterday, slept the minute i got on the bed. Today had tuition, so got delayed a bit. Anyway, yesterday was damn tiring. I went to Chung Cheng school for the wushu competition at 11.00a.m, got 7.63 which wasn't good. After wushu got syf at 6.00p.m. Wah go NUS(National University of Singapore) like wah say. I think i want live there alr. lol. Damn big sia. Then go into the hall like OMG. Looked exactly like the esplanade. Then the whole place looked damn eerie at night time. Then go practice and try out the stage and lights. Den almost ending that time the principal come see us dance one last time. Wah say, i felt damn tired alr. All becoz of the CSB, lol. Then practice finish the CSB say a few things then pass to principal. The principal say what, unique dance and whatever. Then he say we can go to school at 8.00a.m. tmr. Only can skip morning assembly, wtf. All cheer like no need come school like that, wth. Then all hurry pack up bag. My bag full sia, got syf costume and the wushu costume. Had fun time at the backstage though, lol, play a lot. Then the bus take us go queenstown mrt station. I went home from there by mrt. Then this morning i come school a little late coz i miss the first bus, then i see joseph and brandon also come, zzz... Then it was a very very boring day today, wanted to sleep sia. nth else good to say.

Screwed up day.

2009-04-14T17:41:00.003+08:00

Screwed up day today... Everyone lesson except for PE was super boring. Wanted to sleep. Then history remedial that time the xu lao shi come find mr chong say we need go practice for competition. Then the arrogant mr chong said what:" You all want fail then fail ar, not my problem." What the heck. What kind of a bloody teacher is that. Funny meh? Call others bloody idiot when he himself is a bloody idiotic teacher.Then all reluctantly go the accursed syf. Practice till leg no more str only 4.00pm. Then one last practice and went home. Then go home and thought: SHIT, MY SPECS! Wah, damn siao. called my mum to notify her and told dad. No wonder i didn't feel like blogging. Felt very angry today.

QTSS Cross Country

2009-04-09T21:38:00.004+08:00

Went to chinese garden for school cross country at 7. My parents came along, then talk to my friends. Cross country was boring. I was sitting on the floor for a damn long time before the cross country finally start. I go chiong with daryl. around 2/3 of the race track i pang seh daryl and chiong for finish line. Talked to vincent and found out he lost his specs. Then daryl come and mrs dass tasked daryl with giving out the bread to 2A. I helped with marking the name list. Then got some people come di siao daryl ask him give them the bread. Give finish that time go sit around. Daydreamed a lot along the way.

Syf performance

2009-04-07T17:53:00.001+08:00

I had no time to post yesterday about syf, so im doing so now. I had my syf performance in front of upper sec yesterday. quite embarrassing, but i did my best. I felt a little good, and partly because the upper sec were like cheering us on instead of jeering. Felt nice. Just want to get over with it in the syf competiton, get gold and get proud.

Life.

2009-04-01T21:47:00.005+08:00

I realised that life is like a beach. If you wander out too far, you go out into the sea. And the sea sweeps you away no matter how hard you try to swim back. That's why you should never take the wrong path, you won't like it at all. Stay on the beach, and move inland to where safety awaits you.

Syf costumes...

2009-04-01T21:42:00.002+08:00

Just got my syf costume today. Looked like shit! lolx. Pretty embarrassing lar, the costume. Didn't really like it, even though i think its okay. The stupid cape keep falling over my head, the belt so loose and the headband made my hair look like shit. I just hope i get used to the damn costume.

New hamster!

2009-03-22T19:38:00.003+08:00

Don Bro just bought me a new hamster! 1 month old. I didn't really like it. lol. Two hamsters together = Ruby screaming like shit. XD I wanted to name my new hamster Ruby. Then my mom want fafa or lala. lols. Anyway just hope Ruby gets used to her new home. She is timid.

Cut my Hair

2009-03-18T20:34:00.000+08:00

Just cut my hair this afternoon, now i look like a mutt. Just hope that my hair grow fast enough before school reopens.

Random

2009-03-02T20:50:00.001+08:00

I found out i could run fast if i worked on it, but i lazy. I also realized im a lil smart, and i can be a genius if i worked on it, but im lazy once again. Haiz. Damn laziness keeps stopping me in my track from pushing myself to the limit. i need some advice...

Mad day

2009-02-26T15:18:00.003+08:00

Hah funny day. Ajmeer and hon wen fought during recess. Then other boys like shouting: Ajmeer hit him! lol, I didn't care. Then chemistry time the chem teacher go scold joseph, simone, brandon and me for playing with string. Not brandon and my problem lor. Anyhow catch, never even find out what happen. After school some of the boys who stay back go throw the plastic bag and cardboard onto the fan. XD Go home tired alr. Somemore later still got math tuition. Tired man.

Locked up

2009-02-26T15:10:00.004+08:00

Yesterday siao one. Coach ask wushu and chinese dance practice in parade square. Mad sia. Damn embarrassing. Lucky raining. lol. Want take lift up then the lift siao. XD. Then i at third floor there stick my head out and my whole hair all wet like i just shower. Lol somemore got locked up in school. The coach let us off so late. Then all the gates closed. Me, brandon and jospeh almost tried to jump down from the 2nd floor staircase. Then see a while from the top like"Wah no thanks" lol. lucky the zheng lao shi and the cleaner open the gate let us out.=)

School again...

2009-02-08T10:29:00.002+08:00

I hate going to school! so boring everyday man, like im made for such things? nooooo...!!! Anyway at least i got my own diary to write in recently.just hope i can score well.

Back to school again

2009-01-30T00:11:00.004+08:00

Haiz, been quite long since i updated, these 3 days of school like damn boring, still no mood go school. Just played UNO with my cousins. Then earlier on my bro giving me free tuition! XD No need spend money go tuition lol. Wonder if they Sunday coming again. School so boring sia, wish they will come and then i will be happy. My homework all haven't do yet, espacially D&T, later end of Sec 2 also E8 or F9 i laugh loh. zzz i go sleep, so tired.

Time for a change!

2009-01-25T10:44:00.002+08:00

Yesterday i went to my grandma house, the 3 dogs nvr bark! then all except sisi come rushing to door but nvr bark! XD think they too tired. Later, i had new clothes to wear! Yay! After that go play ps3 then later play Wii with cousins. Hardly heard dogs barking.-.-

No school!

2009-01-25T10:38:00.003+08:00

I know its a lil late for what happened 2 days ago but i'll write it anyway. Friday that time brandon, thomas, yang cherh, min ho, joseph, lennard, jacob and me went to around lucky plaza that side go play games. Then at the bus stop calandra, mavis and emmeline went on same bus as us, they got off one stop earlier. Quite expensive lor the place. 2.50 for one hour. Then halfway calandra and emmeline came looking for us to watch movie. They say they want bride wars then later suddenly change to inkheart. Brandon and lennard nvr watch. After that home sweet home! XD Fun day.

My hamster!

2009-01-15T15:24:00.003+08:00

Lol my hamster so strange. I give it newspaper it go take and cover itself to sleep. Maybe its cold, lol so resourceful, wish i can be like that. Haha too bad he got an owner that tortures him XD at least got someone wash his cage and give him food and water and CARE!=) The more funny thing is that it can sleep upside down-.- hands and legs in the air. lol dunno why liddat. funny hamster. MIMI!

Pain

2009-01-15T15:07:00.005+08:00

Yesterday during wushu so funny. The stupid chinese coach go make me fall down. Wah so pain. i got home that time still got a lil pain. that damn saddistic coach. Walao, go wednesday WUSHU like going to CHINESE DANCE LOR. i hate it but must go to mantain my 75% attendance for points. XD

Damn bored...

2009-01-03T15:13:00.002+08:00

zzz... So bored sia school, somemore sec 2 alr, means more study study study stress stress stress... First day alr like wan slp, dunno how im guna cope=( anyway guna have to strugge for the next 3 or 4 years.

Happy new year!

2009-01-01T15:29:00.003+08:00

Sigh... Another year passes again, we are growing more mature. Now just need to prepare for another year of study and hard work. In the end, it's still worth it for our holidays in november and december. So good luck to everyone and Happy new year!